Today’s Phrase for Latin Lovers

Rex in Regno suo superiores habet Deum et Legem.

Translation:
The King in his Realm hath two superiors: God and the Law. -- Henry Care (1646-1688) on English liberties and the Magna Carta

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Ancient History

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Another Casualty of Sarah Palin Rhetoric

Unfortunately there is no new clever, or serious, or boring post on The Prudence Paine Papers tonight. In honor of the determination of the Left and the media to blame Sarah Palin’s “violent rhetoric” for the mass murders in Tucson, the right wing of Twitter was all atwitter today with a new hashtag game: #BlamePalin.

And so, I spent the evening fishing through the entertaining Twitter stream of all the numerous events and items for which Sarah Palin is surely to blame—according to the laws of liberal logic.

As a result, there is one thing for which I know Sarah Palin’s rhetoric is definitely to be blamed: no new Prudence post. #BlamePalin

Therefore, in substitution, I present some of my more favorite #BlamePalin hashtag game entries:

From @PruPaine:

  • the asteroid that killed all the dinosaurs #blamepalin
  • oops… broken link [in that last tweet]. sorry! #blamepalin

From @SooperMexican:

  • @BarackObama‘s failure as a President #blamepalin
  • Fall of Rome #blamepalin

From @leahblizz:

  • Naked Rahm yelled at me in the shower #blamepalin

From @Dtindle:

  • Snuggies, Chia Pets and Mr. Microphone. #BlamePalin

From @ZephyrK9:

  • Continental Drift #BlamePalin

From mybrandieb:

  • The toilet seat was left up and I #BlamePalin

From JonahNRO:

  • My annoying habit of tapping my ballpoint pen against my glass eye when doing crossword puzzles? #blamepalin

From @iowahawkblog:

  • Driving troubled lunatics into insane fits of rage, causing them to get primetime host jobs at MSNBC #BlamePalin
  • Destruction of the Aztecs, Creation of Pontiac Aztek #BlamePalin
  • [NYTimes columnist] Paul Krugman’s confusion whether this hashtag game is sarcastic or not #BlamePalin
  • 36 of Keith Olbermann’s last 43 nervous breakdowns #BlamePalin

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Another clever hashtag game that was popular earlier in the day was #NewTone: gentle mockings of the media’s and the left’s hypocritical call to eliminate all “vitriolic” language, to adopt a new politically correct, Big Brother double-speak tone for public discourse.

From @PruPaine:

  • All episodes of William F Buckley’s “Firing Line” to undergo editing to rename as “Skip Thru the Meadow With Bill” #newtone
  • “screen capture” will now trigger an Amber alert (in reply to @LHphotog: oops, I used “ScreenShots” in my last #tech tweet #NoMeta4s #Dupnik #newTone)

From @rsmccain:

  • I just hit deadline for American Spectator. But I guess “hit” and “deadline” are both violent rhetoric. #NewTone

From @jimgeraghty:

  • U2’s album [War] will now be called, “Disagreement.” #NewTone

From @BrewingAle:

  • “Crosshairs” are now to be referred to as “Orthogonally aligned filamentous biomaterial” #NewTone

From @alexashrugged:

  • In the spirit of a #newtone and getting rid of violent, overheated rhetoric, I call on Rep. Louise Slaughter to change her name

From @diskinetic:

  • WiffleBall, with Chris Matthews! #newtone
  • “Give me liberty, or deeply inconvenience me!” #newtone

From @iowahawkblog:

  • Johnny Cash rewrite: “I hugged a man in Reno / just to watch him smile” #newtone

From @SooperMexican:

  • @KeithOlbermann‘s “Not the best person in their general vicinityyyyyy” #newtone
  • “Death Panels” to be referred to as “life-challenged panels” #newtone
  • White House will be repainted and renamed Off-White House to dissuade ‘black and white” thinking… #newtone
  • UN passes resolution for Islamists to use Environmentally-Friendly and Low-Decibel Suicide Bombs #NewTone

Th-th-th-that’s all, folks.

|Greetings | Prudence Potpourri

The Week in Political Cartoons

The Debt Ceiling Debate:

(via Dana Summers at Townhall)

The RNC Chairman Campaign and Debate to Challenge Michael Steele for the Position:

(via SooperMexican.com)

The PC-ification of Huckleberry Finn:

(via Nate Beeler at Townhall)

The Media’s Finger-Pointing and Blame-Laying in the Aftermath of the Arizona Shooting of Rep. Gabrielle Giffords:

(via Lisa Benson at Townhall)

Isn’t it something how quickly our attention can turn?

|Greetings | Prudence Potpourri

Historic Readings of the Constitution's Preamble

In honor of the historic reading of the Constitution on the floor of the House of Representatives, I present a small collection of preamble performances for your viewing pleasure.

Fife in Fine Form:

Future Congressman:

Shatner Style:

Schoolhouse Rock Redux:

The 112th Congress:

Now let’s abide by it.

|Greetings

A New Tactic for Ground Zero?

A Metro UK Daily Mail story found at SooperMexican’s website presents a new potential protest that could be used here in the US to persuade the Ground Zero megamosque developers to move their insult to an inoffensive location:

It seems an Austrian man upset his mosque neighbors by yodeling one day during their call to prayer. He was fined 700 euros (roughly $940.45).

The world has now come down to…

versus

Greg Gutfeld, host of the 3 am show “Red Eye” on Fox News, has said he will construct a gay bar next door to the Cordoba Initiative mosque if they insist on locating themselves on the perimeter of the Ground Zero war memorial site. Perhaps Gutfeld should instead consider building a yodeling cultural center (complete with a gay bar).

Get ready for the grand opening sing-along now with the book How to Yodel: Lessons to Tickle Your Tonsils and Funnybone, by “world-famous yahooer” Wylie Gustafson. (CD included!)

Or for your listening pleasure, click on the picture above of I Love To Yodel!: The Best Of Country Yodel, Vol. 2 for yodel classics such as “Sweet Little Lover,” “Old Cockatoorali,” “Pappy’s Mountain Still,” “My Pony, My Guitar, And Me,” “Dreammyland Bay” and the eponymous “I Love To Yodel.” (Note this album is volume two.]

That’s for the good ol’ USA cowboy-style yodeling.

For those of you interested in the Alpine-style…and are willing to risk the high fine…

there’s U 2 Can Yodel, by “master yodeler” Kerry Christensen.

Yo-del-lay-he-who?

As Monty Python used to say, “And now, for something completely different”:

Cat Yodeling

A cat lawyer advises me that I should put this disclaimer: Don’t try this at home.

|Greetings

Happy Thanksgiving

Pumpkin Souffle

Wishing everyone a happy turkey day—especially our men and women serving abroad and at home.

On this day (and all days), I’m thankful for your visit to The Prudence Paine Papers. Hope to see you again soon.

|Greetings

Pumpkin Pi

Pumpkin Pi

Yes, We Can Carve Math 2010. Carver/photographer Alex Gleeson.

Low calorie.

(h/t @stackiii)

|Greetings

Congress Realizes It Is a Joke...And Decides to Make It Official

Today, Steven Colbert will appear to perform a comedy routine for a House Judiciary subcommittee.

The Hill reports:

The hearing, titled “Protecting America’s Harvest,” will also feature United Farm Workers President Arturo Rodriguez, who has appeared on Colbert’s show to plug the UFW’s “Take Our Jobs” campaign, which invites Americans critical of illegal immigration to work as laborers in agricultural fields.

Colbert accepted Rodriguez’s offer, and worked for 10 hours on a farm in rural New York last month, picking vegetables.

Not to be outdone, the House Financial Services committee has scheduled Gallagher to perform next Tuesday.

Gallagher Smashes the National Debt for the House Financial Services Committee

Maxine Waters, being on both the Judiciary and Financial Services committees, will be in attendance for both acts/hearings. But she has a warning for Gallagher: “He better bring an extra large tarp, because if any watermelon bits get in my ‘do, he’ll be facing some contempt of Congress charges.”

The House Oversight and Government Reform Committee is attempting to please its members by inviting the San Diego Chicken to testify about whether he is indeed a free-range chicken or, as has been alleged by his trainer, he achieved his freakish growth through steroid usage. The Chicken is refusing to appear, noting the perjury charges now facing Roger Clemens after his testimony before the same committee. The committee is therefore issuing a subpoena to compel him to appear (and to bring t-shirts to shoot out of a cannon).

The San Diego Chicken Hopes for Softballs From Congress

UPDATE:

Byron York of the Washington Examiner issued the declaration that the Colbert appearance had embarrassed the congressmen. As if that’s anything new. Oh, wait, it is. Usually it’s the congressmen embarrassing themselves.

Michelle Malkin bailed out early on the “testimony,” writing, “Can’t watch this fiasco anymore,” and therefore missing out on the carnival show of elected representatives asking serious questions to a smarmy fictional character. (See her posting for a good background on the topic the committee hearing was supposed to be addressing.)

Update II: The Daily Caller provides an excellent summary of Colbert’s mockimony.

|Greetings

MAJOR Announcement!

–For Immediate Release–

Prudence Paine is pleased to announce the unveiling of a new profile logo and background tile for her Twitter account: @PruPaine.

The overhaul has been costly and focus grouped extensively. There was a slight delay in receiving the final product as the design consultant had to interrupt his work last week for about 15 minutes to do a logo redesign for someone else. But finally, it’s in our hands–and on our Twitter page. Please do enjoy.

Here’s the new profile logo:

And my new background tile:

I’m reliably informed that the focus groups that saw these masterpieces of graphic arts went bonkers at the sight of them, man and woman alike shrieking with girlish delight as if the Beatles had just walked into the room. They pledged to follow all of my political dictates if only sealed with the logo.

As I’m sure you feel the same, please stand by for further instructions….

**********
URGENT UPDATE!!!!!
I’ve been duped!

So much for originality. I’m going back to my old logo.

[NOTE to any confused readers: This post’s inspiration is explained here.]

|Greetings

Independence Day Launch

Welcome to the Prudence Paine Papers. We’ve set our beginning to coincide with the anniversary of our nation’s start.

One Tattered Old Glory (ca. 1980) in the National Archives

Our quest is similar to the original Declaration of Independence and the Constitutional Convention (though as humble peasants, we certainly don’t expect as earth-shattering results nor do we proclaim to possess the brainpower of the founders).

We merely place our tiny feet in their footprints and try to regain their ground, so foolishly ceded in the intervening generations. We seek to begin again, to return to our roots, to wash away all the mud and slime and corrosion that has caked the brilliantly shining star atop our standard.

We take inspiration and encouragement from our fellow men already knee-deep in the battle trenches. We add our voice to theirs, hoping to rally them with our cheers and cries. Along the way, we will attempt to awaken the still sleeping, to give courage to the timid, to knock some sense into the mistaken, and to run the corrupt out of town on a rail.

Happy Fourth of July, America.