Today’s Phrase for Latin Lovers

Rex in Regno suo superiores habet Deum et Legem.

Translation:
The King in his Realm hath two superiors: God and the Law. -- Henry Care (1646-1688) on English liberties and the Magna Carta

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Ancient History

|Campaign 2016 | Political Prudence

Vote to STOP HILLARY and an Incompetent GOP

 

southporticochristmasI’m heading to the polls today with one primary goal in mind: to stop Hillary. And there’s only one way to achieve that goal: to vote for Donald Trump.

In 2008, I refused to hold my nose and vote for John McCain. I didn’t see the utter destruction to America that wrecking ball Barack Obama could do. Now I know that if Hillary wins today, it will be the end of America as we know it. There will be no chance to ever recover what we have lost. The shameful transformation of America will be locked in.

  • All of Obama’s unconstitutional executive orders will remain.
  • Obamacare will slowly be shifted into a socialist one-payer system, destroying America’s leadership in world-class health care.
  • More regulations will be piled on top business, making the economy further groan under the weight. More spending will beget more taxation and borrowing. Been looking for a better job? A full-time job? Hoping to get better pay? [insert sound of Hillary’s cackle.]
  • Hillary will likely appoint three or more US Supreme Court judges, shifting it into a left-wing Constitution-hating body that will look to international courts for its judgments.
  • The Second Amendment will be restricted. The Fourth Amendment will continue to be neglected.
  • The welfare state will be expanded. Illegal immigration will not be restrained, but rewarded. Terrorists will be imported under the guise of compassion.
  • Our military will continue to disintegrate and our enemies will grow strong and push us around. We will cower before them. We will give in and humiliate ourselves. We will pay more ransoms and let our friends get taken over.
  • And the Clinton years of scandal after scandal and the selling of the White House that occurred from 1992 to 2000 will look like child’s play during the next eight years. It will be utterly exhausting keeping up with their corruption and criminality.

America will be trashed. It will be over.

There will be no looking to finally elect a Republican that will “fix it” in 2020 or 2024. There will be nothing left to fix. The demolition of all we hold dear will be permanent.

So today, I’m voting for Donald Trump, because he is the only one that has any chance of beating Hillary Clinton. A vote for anyone else—or a lack of voting—is a full acceptance of the destruction of America as we know it.

There’s no guarantee that Trump would do the right thing on any of the issues above. At heart, I’m betting he’s as liberal as Hillary—but he’s made a lot of promises to people. Maybe he will keep some of them.

But one thing is for sure: it will be a whole lot easier to impeach Trump than it will be to impeach a Clinton. So a vote for Trump is a vote for a potential President Pence within a year or so.

DOWN BALLOT

For Congress, I’m recommending Trump voters go the opposite way. Unless your Senator or Congressman has been labeled an “extremist” by the GOP and the media, he has likely been part of the problem, part of the aiding and abetting Obama’s transformation of America. They do not deserve reelection.

In the Senate, Majority Leader Mitch McConnell has destroyed any attempt to fight Obama. It’s no wonder that the Obamacare headquarters just happened to land in Kentucky, his home state. Do you think Mitch is going to try to do anything that takes that political plum away from his voters? Hell no. But reelecting a Republican Senate is just going to put him back at the head of the American giveaway.

What good has Kelly Ayotte or John McCain done? They’ve given the store away to Obama, too afraid to fight him on anything. Mark Kirk wouldn’t take a stand on anything remotely right-wing for fear it would make him unelectable, and he’s STILL unelectable. The list goes on: Richard Burr, Ron Johnson, Lisa Murkowski, Roy Blunt, Pat Toomey. What have they contributed to defeating Obama’s terrible agenda? Nothing. Even Tim Scott, originally elected as a Tea Party favorite, has gone establishment. His pet issue? Education. That is not the job of a US Senator.

When we gave the GOP the House, we were told they couldn’t get anything done unless we gave them the Senate. So we worked hard and gave them the Senate. Ever since, we’ve been chastised and mocked when asking why they can’t get anything done when they control Congress. We’ve been told that all of that means nothing if they don’t have the White House. We’ve been told that controlling the Senate doesn’t carry any weight.

So let’s abide all the lectures we’ve received. Let’s throw all the lazy ones out, the ones without cajones, which is about all of them, save the rabblerousers like Ted Cruz and Mike Lee and Rand Paul. It won’t matter if the Senate is controlled by Democrats if we control the White House, right? Because by the GOP argument, the Democrats won’t be able to do a single thing to stop whatever a GOP President wants. They will have to pass all his budgets without any reductions. They’ll have to pass all his nominees. They won’t fight his executive orders. They will be as impotent as the GOP Senate has been.

And if Hillary wins today, having a Democrat Senate will be far better for speeding the collapse of America, for turning us into a socialist paradise just as quick as possible–because the sooner we get there, the sooner the paradise will be revealed as a nightmare, and maybe then, Americans will wake up and clamor for the days when there was something called the American Dream.

Either way, using the GOP leadership’s logic, it’s no big deal if we lose the Senate. The White House holds all the power. We’ll get rid of all the dead weight. We’ll clear the slate for some new right-minded guys. And we won’t have some harrumphing potentate at its head trying to protect Obamacare so that he keeps its shiny corrupt headquarters in his state.

|Campaign 2016 | Political Prudence

In the GOP Primary Odyssey, Trump Is the Cyclops

The cyclops Polyphemus is perhaps the most famous villain in the ancient epic The Odyssey. He’s a giant, rude and violent ogre with one eye, and he could very well be the death of the hero and his companions.

Let me recount the tale for you, and as I do, keep in mind, there’s a newfangled version of it playing out in the GOP primary right now—although we don’t know yet whether, at this pivotal moment, our modern warriors will take the same actions to free themselves or will be gobbled up. (I’ve put our contemporary cast of characters at the bottom of this post, and linked them in the story as footnotes for your convenience.)

TrumpCyclopsWide

The Tale of Polyphemus

On their long, horrible voyage trying to get back home1 from the Trojan war, Odysseus2 and his dwindling band of men3 land on the island of the creatures known as the cyclops. The men are in need of food supplies. A scavenger group leaves their battered ship and comes upon a cave stocked with sheep and milk and cheese. Before they gather up the groceries, however, the hulking cave dweller comes home. It’s Polyphemus4. He’s hideous.

Now in ancient Greece, hospitality was highly prized. If someone showed up to your party without an invite, you were still expected to offer them all the best you had, no questions asked—at least until the stranger had his fill of your wine and roasted meat and perhaps a nap. To do otherwise was gauche.

But Polyphemus wasn’t much for hospitality. In fact, he did the most ill-mannered thing possible. Instead of offering a meal, he snatched up a couple of Odysseus’ men, bashed their heads in and made a meal of them instead.

Unfortunately for the rest of the guests, when Polyphemus came in, he had rolled a massive boulder in front of the cave door. There was to be no escape for Odysseus and his men. The cyclops was going to simply eat them, two by two, until there were none left.

So our conquering hero devises a plan. They must attack Polyphemus, but they don’t want to kill him, because they need him to open the door for them. It’s the only way they can all get out. (Even with their combined strength, the Odysseus crew cannot budge the boulder. They are trapped inside the nightmarish hovel.)

The next morning, Polyphemus awakes and breakfasts on two more of Odysseus’ men. They are frantic with fear. But they watch as Polyphemus rolls the boulder out of the way to let his giant sheep5 out before sealing the door shut again to keep his remaining human quarry inside.

Aha! The best way out is to pretend to be sheep going out to pasture in the morning. But even with just one eye, Polyphemus will be able to see that they aren’t giant sheep. They need to blind him. So they find a giant timber, work one end into a sharp point and stash it away until the opportunity to use it arises.

Polyphemus comes home that night from a day in the fields and feasts on another pair of men. It’s time, urgent time, to put the plan into action.

Odysseus had brought along some undiluted potent wine on their scavenger trip, so he offers the wine to Polyphemus as a gift to wash down his revolting dinner. The cyclops enjoys the wine and actually becomes a little friendly with Odysseus, asking what his name is. Odysseus replies, “Nobody.”

Once Polyphemus passes out, the hero and his men retrieve the hidden timber and harden its point in the fire until it becomes a red-hot poker. Then they muster all their strength, surround the cyclops and plunge the fiery stick into his sleeping eye.

The plan could have all gone awry then, when the neighborhood cyclops6 hear Polyphemus screaming bloody murder. They rush to the boulder at the cave door and ask, “What’s going on in there?” Polyphemus cries out, “Nobody is stabbing me in the eye! Nobody is stabbing me!” The other cyclops all shake their heads and laugh. What a loon that guy in there is, they think, and they leave.

When the blinded cyclops passes out again, Odysseus ties each of his men to the belly of sheep, and in the morning, Polyphemus rolls the boulder out of the way and blindly feels the top of each departing animal to make sure it’s a sheep and not a man.

Once all the men have escaped, they race back to the boat. Their party can set sail and leave the cyclops behind, taking his sheep with them. Phew!

But that’s when Odysseus’ pride takes over, though. He can’t leave well enough alone and be satisfied they had escaped with their lives. When they sail past the blinded Polyphemus, the hero wants his name to be known. He can’t resist letting Polyphemus know that it wasn’t Nobody that defeated him. It was Odysseus!

Bad move. The ancient Greeks disliked hubris, and it turns out that Polyphemus’ father was the powerful god of the sea, Poseidon, who soon takes revenge on the men for his crippled son. But that’s another story. One that the GOP will preferably avoid, happy instead to just be sailing off towards home.

Present-day Cast of Characters

1 Home The White House ↩Return to Tale

2 Odysseus Ted Cruz, of course, in my version, but feel free to make whatever candidate you like to be the hero of the tale. He crafts the plan and executes it, even when lesser men are going weak in the knees. ↩Return to Tale

3 The men The other candidates beyond our hero. It takes all the men to pitch in to defeat Polyphemus. There’s no one hanging back in the corner, thinking he’ll wait it out until all the other guys get eaten and then somehow escape on his own. No, cowards die. There will be no “kleos,” no glory if you don’t get in there and fight. ↩Return to Tale

4 Polyphemus Donald Trump, blustering, boorish, nasty and vicious. Doesn’t have great depth perception of what policies it will take to Make America Great Again. More of a monovision type of guy. Limited, but gets the job done. ↩Return to Tale

5 The sheep The voters that the cyclops shepherds. We need them to escape with the candidates. ↩Return to Tale

6 The other cyclops The media and entertainment wing. They’ll laugh now, write it up later. They are excited about the fabulous ratings, clicks and cocktail party invitations the latest news of that wacky Polyphemus will bring them. ↩Return to Tale

Fast Forward to Texas Debate Night

Men have been eaten. Their bones litter the stage. Each candidate has a collection of shivs carefully prepared by their staff. There’s not many left to have the combined strength to climb up on Polyphemus and incapacitate him!

But wait. What’s this? Oddly, some of the men seem to be eyeing the other men, looking to take down the hero. Oh no. What foolishness is afoot.

Will they come to their senses and free themselves and the cyclops’ voters in time?

Stay tuned.

Special thanks to SooperMexican for the TrumPolyphemus image.

|Nostalgia

The 2011 2nd Annual Sooper-Proodey Year In Review Awards

[Lights dim. Timpani drum roll. Baritone-voiced announcer booms throughout the auditorium.]

Ladies and gentlemen…welcome! to the 2011 Second Annual Sooper-Proodey Awards. Here are your hosts, SooperMexican and Prudence Paine.

[Curtains part. Sooper enters in a dashing black tuxedo and red cape, with Proodey in a matching evening gown, to uproarious applause. Soop smiles and motions for everyone to take their seats.]

Thank you, thank you. You are too kind. Gracias. Thank you. It’s such a pleasure to have you all join us once again as we take a moment on New Year’s Day to look over all the scandals, shenanigans, milestones and memories of the past year. As with our inaugural 2010 ceremony, we’ll mark our progress with comparisons to the previous year. Proodey?

Thank you, Soop. It’s such an exciting night! What a glamorous audience! So many glittering awards! Without further ado, let’s get the big show rolling with our first golden trophy:

[heralding trumpets]

THE FEDERAL BOOT ON OUR THROATS AWARD

In 2010, the Obama administration erected a federal caged wrestling ring and  demonstrated their cunning honey badger nature in carrying out their grudge match against Big Business. We all gasped at their audacity as Obama’s tag team threw the giant BP to the mat, cracked the Folding Chair of Due Process over its corporate corpus and placed their lead-filled boot on the company’s throat until it cried “uncle” and stuffed twenty billion dollars into the presidential unitard.

In 2011, the O-team has not let up on its full-scale assault on the engines of the US economy, breathing down Business’ back and picking its pockets, acting like they just don’t care as corporate America yelps for mercy. This year, the Obama crew has gone after private industry with a vengeance, smashing the beautifully inlaid neck of  Gibson Guitar with a piledriver maneuver and putting the Keystone Pipeline in a sleeper hold.

And this year’s winner…or more appropriately, this year’s loser of the Federal Boot on the Throat Award is…

[pops envelope flap open]

Boeing! [approving applause]

Obama’s union minions dizzied this behemoth with a lengthy airplane spin, until it begged to be allowed to use union labor forevermore. Congratulations, fellas! For caving in to the National Labor Relations Board‘s demands, your planes will being weighted down with a fat and nappy workforce for years to come. Come on up and claim your award, Boeing!

[The still punch-drunk Boeing staggers toward the stage but stumbles and falls into some starlet’s lap. Audience gasps, giggles and guffaws.]

Ooof! Boeing’s gonna have one major hangover tomorrow! That’s okay, boys. We’ll send your award over to you, with an icepack and some bloody mary mix. Take it away, Soop! What’s up next?

[Sooper takes the microphone.] Thank you, Proodence.

On a more somber note, every year we see capricious mother Gaia strike down our fellow man for our sins against our emotional global mother. In 2010, Haiti experienced one of the worst nature-caused disasters, and 2011 had its own share of anguish and misery. A massive earthquake struck off the coast of Japan, which triggered a disastrous tsunami. Storms hit Alabama with terrible results, flooding enveloped Thailand, and a 7.2 earthquake caused many deaths in Turkey.

In order to recognize that life has many trials and tribulations, we offer the following acknowledgement:

THE WORST GAIA-CURSED DISASTER TO BEFALL MAN FOR 2011

…and the winnah is…

[bongo beats]

The 2012 GOP Presidential Candidates!!!

[wild applause]

Yes, yes, even the most positive Pollyannaish pro-Republican ideologue could not but grimace at the stumbling and bumbling events of the 2012 GOP run to replace Obama. From Cain’s numerous “indiscretions,” which were obviously trumped up by pizza-hating conspirators, and Rick Perry’s marble-mouthed rhetorical skills, to Michele Bachmann’s flapping eyelashes, Ron Paul’s Paulophrenia, and Mitt Romney’s placid smile programmed and poll-tested by his Wall Street puppeteers, no one seems pleased by the debates. No one, that is, except the Democrats, as the venerable Thomas Sowell points out.

Let’s not forget whiny Rick Santorum, demanding attention like a petulant teacher’s pet, or Jon Huntsman, the only one running for European president of the United States, with his not-so-subtle condescension and clumsy attempts at edgy humor. There was the awful effort by Donald Trump’s toupee to moderate a debate in order to promote his show and advocate the bombing of China and the forced extraction of Iraqi children’s vital fluids.

Today the feeding frenzy will be consummated by the first caucus, in Iowa, and the circular firing squad will arm itself with automatic weaponry to take more victims on this bloody, weary road to challenge Obama. More and more, we, the conservative public, are seized with the boring dread of impending election acceptance. Perhaps this campaign season has done to us what 40 years of Europeanized social engineering could not do: afflicted us with existential ennui!

[Prudence emerges from the curtain and briskly joins SooperMexican at the microphone. Smiling she says:] *ahem* Excuse me, ladies and gentlemen. I need just a quick word with my cohost here…

[With a clenched smile, she whispers into Soop’s ear. The audience hushes to strain to listen to her barely audible words over the PA.] Mexy! While I can tolerate some gentle jabbing at MY Michele and the two Ricks, I did not know that you were going to protect one candidate from any lambasting. And how convenient that unmentioned candidate just happens to be YOUR candidate, the Noot!!!!

[Soop gently shoves Proodey behind curtain]

As I was saying… Not even Paul Krugman could see an upside to this disaster, and he’s a Keynesian! I need a tequila shot or three. Proodey, take away the next award!

 

Thank you, NewtperMexican.

[Proodey slips a mickey into Soop’s drink while he’s distracted by her dress.]

Last year, the Tea Party changed the face of Congress and put fear in the pants of big spenders. Did Time magazine make the Tea Party the Man of the Year, acknowledge that they had made the greatest impact on the events of 2010? Silly question, I know. Of course it did not. Because Time does not agree with the Tea Party’s objectives.

Yet Time had the brazenness to name a bunch of rock-throwing, raping, cop-car-defecating, lice-infested hipsters as its 2011 Man of the Year. It raised on to its liberal pedestal people who have no mission other than to provoke local police forces and municipal governments that have no means to resolve their unstated concerns even if they agreed with them.

Therefore, in honor of Time‘s glorification of civic inanity and hippie nostalgia, we present…

TIME’S SCAM OF THE YEAR AWARD!

We searched through all the Occupy Wall Street videos to find the one that best captures their purpose, their intelligence, their method of communicating to shine the light on Time’s vaunted Man of the Year.

And the winner is…..

Nightmare on Occupy Wall Street! [audience gives twinkles]

Ecce the prime example of what Time (the measure, not the magazine) will soon forget, if it ever took notice in the first place:

[applause]

Take it away, el Sooper! Not that I’m implying that you steal stuff. By the way, I’d like my hubcaps back, please….

They have been appropriated for the glorious Reconquista.

This year has seen the coming-of-age of that venerable social media microblogging platform that I like to call… el Twitter. We saw celebrities, sports figures, politicians, pundits all make headlines because of their inane and often incredibly stupid gaffes on twitter! In addition, we saw many bloggers and citizen journalists use this media to seize fifteen minutes of fame, and beyond!

Last year, we awarded this honor named for Meghan McCain to Keith Olbermann, the worst tweeter in the world; this year, we have many, many worthy nominees competing for the coveted:

MEGHAN McCAIN BOOBY PRIZE!

And the winner is… [breaks pinata… kids grab all the candies. Soop waltzes into the mexi-throng, grabs an envelope and opens it…]

The winner is Alec Baldwin!!

[the crowd goes wild, laughing and clapping and tweeting insults to the #AlecBaldwin hashtag]

Because he’s been committed to a sanatorium, to accept his prize is his interlocutor and twitter nemesis, SooperMexican!! [hands award to himself]

Only Alec Baldwin could carry the moron torch that hath been passed on by Keith Olbermann with his liberal twitter rant spurtings. He began his lonely drunken march into insanity by tussling with a very handsome and witty Sooper Mexican on twitter once, and then once again. He insulted America’s moms, and tried to mock conservatives on twitter by comparing his follower and tweet counts! Now there’s a man who’s secure with himself.

To add insult to his own mental injury, he caused a scene on an airplane, had to be tossed off by the captain, and tweeted arrogantly about it. He then shamelessly portrayed the pilot apologizing to Baldwin on Saturday Night Live, showing the entire world his smug vainglory cannot be quelled! Thankfully, the ridicule he received made him recede from the twittersphere at least

Finally, as a Christmas gift to America, Alec sadly announced that his dream had died of rising above a bit character on a sitcom with poor ratings and running for mayor of New York City.

As the writer of the twitter pebble that got the big idiotic elitist rock rolling towards the abyss, I’d like to say, “Thank you, Alec. Thank you so much.”

[Sooper bows to a standing ovation, breaks the award over his knee, and motions to Prudence.]

That was quite a sooper smackdown! And the bad behavior continued all over the world all year long—and not just by celebrities. Politicians competed to see who could crash and burn in the most dazzling sex scandal. In honor of 2010’s most bizarre sex scandal leading to the resignation of a political figure, we present…

[tambourine shake, shake, shake, thump]

THE ERIC MASSA “TICKLE ME” AWARD!

And our nominees are…

[chorus of bleating vuvuzela horns]

Arnold Schwarzenegger! He admitted to his mistress and his 13-year-old love child. Since he waited until after his term as a liberal Republican governor of California ran out before he revealed this teenage tidbit, he didn’t lose his job—-but he did lose a wife…maybe.

Then there’s John Edwards. Fortunately for us, he never made it into the Pennsylvania Avenue job for which he tried to sell his soul on Ebay, so it wasn’t his to lose. Yet there was enough proof that an old woman (and others) bought him, so he could pass her money on to hush up his pregnant honey. After years of his running from the law and paparazzi, a grand jury handed down an indictment earlier this year, leaving him to insinuate that he was contemplating suicide and begging his mistress to marry him or move in so that she can’t testify against him.

Across the pond, there was Silvio Berlusconi losing his long-held job as Italy’s Prime Minister for his hosting teenage prostitutes at his “bunga bunga” sex dinners. (Guess even Italians that elect a porn star and a pre-op transgender communist to their parliament have their limits for political propriety.)

Straddling the pond, Dominique Strauss-Kahn, head of the International Monetary Fund, got accused of rape by a hotel maid, only to have the New York district attorney drop the charges against him when the woman’s accusations seemed to fall apart, but not before DSK resigned from his job and a French journalist claimed he tried to rape her during an interview in 2002.

Businessman Herman Cain’s train to the White House was quickly derailed once decade-old charges of sexual harassment turned into the revelation of a 13-year mistress. (Wonder if a numerologist would connect him and Arnold on that?)

And last but not least, we have the Three Lustkateers: Chris Lee (R-NY), he of the bare chested Craigslist ad that turns out of have been seeking transgendered hookups; David Wu (D-OR), happily insane he of the footie tiger suit and affair with the underage daughter of a supporter; and Anthony Weiner (D-NY), he of the underwear tweets who apparently was also trying to arrange a male-dominated menage a trois with women he was sexting around the country.

Trannies and tigers and trios, oh my!

Out of all of these philanderers, the one that tickles us the most, and therefore the winner, is….may I have the envelope please…

[Andrew Breitbart moseys out and over to the microphone, carrying the award envelope. He addresses the surprised audience, as their bewilderment turns to excited cheers of recognition.]

I’m here coincidentally. I just arrived at LaGuardia and at the media’s request, I came on over. I didn’t know they were going to be announcing this. I’m staying at a hotel about three blocks away, so I decided to come on by and see who the winner was. [Audience murmurs. Breitbart rips open the envelope]

And the winner of the Tickle Me Massa Award is…

…for perpetuating a false malicious meme in blaming the messenger, blowing up his own job while still keeping his Twitter open (unlike Alec Baldwin doing the reverse)

WeinerGate!

[Thunderous audience applause]

Thank you, Andrew Breitbart for stopping by. [Audience applauds and stands, as he walks off the stage]

Let’s use this moment to present our new…

LIGHTNING AWWWWWWWAAAARRRRDDDDD!

This special prize goes to our favorite RedEye correspondent on the Fox News late night show. We completely neglected this prestigious award last year, so this fella will be forever known as our first recipient. [audience shifts nervously in their seats]

And the winner is… [maracas shake]

Flamenco Chihuahua!!!!!

[Audience erupts into cheers and begins a conga line through the auditorium to Juanlu Montoya’s “Ana Maria”!]

But now, back to our regularly scheduled programming, and here’s SooperMexy with another major award!

[Sooper saunters out, margarita in hand, as a mariachi band plays a peppy tune.]

I’m not sure what’s in this drink. Or what’s going on at this awards show.

As we peer glassy-eyed through the hazy margarita glass of news stories past, we’re reminded of the domestic terror attack way back in February 2010 on the IRS building in Austin, Texas. The media took no small measure of glee in quickly connecting it to every conservative they could think of, short of claiming it was an inside job organized by Abe Lincoln. 2011 saw its own share of some of the worst knee-jerk media reactions to underdeveloped stories. But with the emergence of New Media, the common person has been able to define for himself the context of the news he reads, and even craft his own headlines! In fact, pinko commie media has gotten so bad, conservatives have gotten tired of hearing about it; it’s the same old story, over and over.

In that spirit, let’s delve into boredom once more, and see the worst…

KNEE-JERK MEDIA REACTION of 2011!

[tweets out to the prize committee from his iPhone. Receives a direct message… reads:]

And the winner is.. whoah! This unprecedented!!! A Three-Way tie!!! [confused applause]

The winners are… the pathetic media coverage of the Arab Spring in Egypt, the tragic shooting of Gabby Giffords, and the Oslo shooter!

The supposed Arab Spring in Egypt was lauded by media pundits as a democratic uprising against a Middle Eastern tyrant, Hosni Mubarak. As the coverage continued, as much as news outlets wanted to assign credit to their saint and savior Barack Obama, he would not speak out in favor of the revolution, nor would he send any support. The days ticked by as his bony, gangly finger stuck stubbornly in the air, trying to sense what wind of fortune would direct his vague and ill-conceived foreign policy. Meanwhile, the media, and later, the Occupy protestors, gladly embraced the overthrow, with not a thought to the chance that maybe this pro-Western despot might be the only thing keeping the extremist Islamo-fascists from power.

Now, in an incredible effort to backpedal, the Left is trying to rebrand the Muslim Brotherhood as moderates, since even more extreme Islamists seized power in recent elections. It’s tough to stay intellectually honest while justifying your discredited biases!

Second, just to be fair, is the knee-jerk reaction of conservatives, including myself, when the horrible news of the Oslo shootings came out. Immediately, and I think reasonably, many conservatives posited that this was an Islamist attack. As the details came out, we realized that this was the shooter the media was waiting for: Caucasian, supposedly Christian, easily labeled as a right-wing extremist. Then, surprisingly, as more details came out, he seemed to end up being some weird mix of European nationalism and Nietzschean power-of-the-will atheist existentialism.

Finally, the terrible shooting of Gabby Giffords (D-AZ) provided us with the worst and most maddening of knee-jerk reactions by the media. Before the victims’ blood could dry, the media had already gleefully pinned this on Sarah Palin and other conservatives. Markos of the Daily Kos broke the speed of sound while running to type this accusation: “Mission Accomplished, Sarah Palin.” They voraciously reported on any tidbit of insinuation that the insane shooter, Jared Loughner, was a Tea Partier (he wasn’t), a Rush Limbaugh enthusiast (nope, not that either), or a rabid conservative (wrong again). As it turns out, he was obsessed with a grammatical conspiracy that brainwashes Americans.

Far from admitting his insanity, and their culpability, the media will allow the occasional vague attribution of guilt to Sarah Palin, the lightning rod of liberal criticism. This was so egregious that it occasioned an famous opinion column by Jonah Goldberg entitled “To Hell With You People,” wherein he documents instance after instance of Democrats calling conservatives terrorists, and then claiming the high ground when accusing us of violent hate-speech that supposedly led to the Giffords’ shooting.

So to you, the gutless, idiotic, double-faced media, we give you this award. We’re sure there will be many more to come!

Ahhh, what a show! *hic* As this ceremony and what’s left of my sobriety come to a close, I’d like to thank everyone for such a great year in twitter politics! Oh the hashtag games, and snarky political commentaritweets that we had! And a great big thanks to guest bloggerette Prudence Paine!!

And thank you to my debonair guest blogger, SooperMexican. What a night it’s been! Your chariot awaits, Mexy. [loads him into a wheelbarrow and starts rolling him out]

[SooperMexy calls out over his shoulder:] But before you go, vote on the last GringOpinion poll of 2011: which one of the awardees should win the grand prize? Write-ins welcome!

 


[curtain closes. orchestra begins the recessional music. audience meanders out in a daze…AFTER casting their poll vote!]

|Tweetastic

In My Butterfly Net: 2011-04-01

Here’s what the little men in white coats captured from the scattered tweets and thoughts that fluttered forth from the mind of Prudy in the last 24 hours:
 

  • The Libyan “Kinetic Military Action” is not going well. NBC’s Jim Maceda reported, after apologizing that the media had done such a poor job reporting it: “It’s not Khadaffy’s army that has Libya rebels on run. It’s LOCAL MILITIAS in pickups.”

    What have we gotten into? If ordinary citizens are going out on their own to fight the “rebels,” perhaps we haven’t thought this whole thing through, have we? [*]
  • Donald Trump is running for President, unofficially for now, but… He has made a bold splash in the media by asking why doesn’t Obama just release his long-form birth certificate and end all speculation. MSNBC’s Daily Rundown hungrily booked him, and then @savannahguthrie and @chucktodd openly mocked him, rolled their eyes, smirked and postured, and asked him preposterous questions, in their phone interview. Would they have done the same thing, treated him as disrespectfully, if he had been sitting right across from him? How was that a “news” interview? The name of your show is the Daily Rundown, not the Daily Show, and you really aren’t that funny. In fact, you’re rather humorless. #LeanDisrespectful #PoorManners #Cowards [#]

    FUN SIDE NOTE: Saw someone comment that the Birther label is really a misnomer. It should be applied to all those that believe Obama WAS born in the US, not those that have questions about it.
  • Quote from Thursday’s Stossel show on Fox Business: “Where’s the anti-war movement now? They weren’t anti-war, they were anti-Bush, and they aren’t anti-Obama.” –Cato Institute’s @David_Boaz [*]
  • @The_Alien tweeted: “The next Osama bin Laden is currently a lieutenant in the ranks of Libyan rebels.” I can’t help but think his current lieutenant is probably there right now too. [#]
  • @SamValley tweeted: Socialists agree in limited choice, as long as they get a personal waiver.” But I’ve always suspected that socialists think they’ll be the ones in charge, making the rules, not the peons having to live under them. [#]
  • The Lottery Game: Odds assure the ticket-issuing government will pay out less in prizes than the amount of money the ticket sales take in. Fine. That’s typical of any business. There is an expectation of profit. But the magical government part occurs when the winning customers receive only a portion of their promised winnings, losing nearly 50% of the winnings once all taxes get collected—mostly by the very same government giving them the money.

    That would be like going to any business, say, a barbeque restaurant, and ordering a pound of pulled pork, but receiving only half a pound. And you drive away content to have received whatever they gave you. Heaven help you if you don’t want receive your pulled pork half pound over 20 years. You want it now, for dinner tonight. That means you’ll be receiving only the fraction of that half pound that the restaurant would have to invest today to earn, with compound interest, the full half pound by the end of 20 years. Hope you weren’t very hungry. [#]
  • Chevy Volts are the Pocket Chairs of automobiles. (The Pocket Chair is a flimsy-seeming camping chair that can be compactly folded to fit in a pocket and taken everywhere. The ads appear on middle-of-the-night TV, such as during the 3am show “RedEye.”) [inspiration: SwedenG *]

[*] = clickable link to the original Prudy tweet, which may or may not have been modified here, for elaboration or clarification